new

March 2013

Eight days post break up, I make a new friend at work. Growing up where I did, friendships always ran in the same circles. I love this about my home town, my school and my friends – I have known them since I started high school, they know everything about me, I know everything about them and the Train Driver was part of the same group. We are like one big family really. New friends aren’t commonly made, never frowned upon or anything – but we have what we need and aside from our work lives, our pre-existing friendship group was priority. I have been noticing since the Train Driver first left the country that while I revel and relish in this family friendship network – I also want something else. Is the budding friendship with my colleague the path I need for excitement, change, anonymity and opportunity? I think so. I hope so. Hurt by the old, I am desperately craving the new.

The Giraffes nickname is given to my new friend and I at drinks on Friday night in the work bar – we are both wearing patterned harem pants, black t-shirts and heels – with naturally long legs. We unite in our common Giraffe ground and decide that this new friendship, coupled with our new matching Facebook relationship status’ deserved, and actually required, a bottle of champagne …& quick. We agree on Sunday afternoon – which just so happens to be St Patrick’s day. As we are both owners of recently hurt hearts, we agree that the only thing banned from Sunday is wearing the colour green – everything else; tears sadness, excitement, fear – all welcome. This is going to be a friendship based on anything and everything new – 2013’s St Patrick’s day wasn’t about celebrating our Irish friends – it was about our new single adventures.

Sunday arrives and Friday nights energy seems to be the result and a distant memory invited by some Dutch (/central Otago) courage. The bravery and excitement must have only been a mask – a mask that has been stripped bare and has reinvited fear and heartbreak back in to my life. With puffy eyes and a tear-stained face I send a text to my new friend and apologise, kindly telling her that I can’t meet her for a drink this afternoon as my enemies are back.

Giraffe: Aw hun, I’m sorry you’re having such a rough day. What a perfect way to get out of the mood you’re in – by coming and having a drink with me!

bambi: I’m really sorry, I just don’t think I can – another time?

Giraffe: *address* – a glass of champagne is waiting for you – if you are still in tears after a glass of Verve Cliquot, you can go home, promise – but for now, at least give it a go. See you soon Giraffe, remember – no green!

Here it is. My sliding doors moment. Do I go, do I stay…?

I throw on my comfy black jeans, a plain white tee and my favourite Lady Danger lipstick. I jump in the car and follow google maps navigation to my never ventured destination – metaphorically and figuratively. I arrive and my new friend is right, a glass of champagne is waiting for me while a fun girly playlist is playing on her Spotify. The latest Ellie Goulding song comes on and we instantly look at each other. There’s a sparkle in our eyes, that this time wasn’t derived from tears – we sense a bond has been formed while listening to the lyrics of the chorus. We can do this, the bravery and excitement mask is back on – but this time there’s a glimmer of hope behind it, with the Giraffe’s together, perhaps the we can both overcome our recent heartbreak?

…anything can happen

xo bambi

distanced hearts club ♥

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